- THE ROAD TO EPILOGUE IS PAVED WITH GNORPS — (the) New Gnorp Times #24 - 25 June 2026
Hello friends! It's been a while, so surely it must be time for some gnorp news. This post will be about Epilogue, an upcoming (free) expansion to the game that will bring new mechanics, an (almost) entirely new set of talents, new buildings, and lots more! Where Are We At??There's been some ups and downs. A few months ago I decided to implement a new system for the expansion. That system was implemented in full, but in testing it was found lacking, which meant I had to re-engineer it. It was supposed to be the final piece of the puzzle but ended up as the final (fingers crossed) headache. The HeadacheI set out to solve the following problem: Decision making in Gnorp can sometimes feel a little bit front-loaded. You pick your talents, and set sail towards a certain future. At least certain in the sense that you know what you're about to do. A slammer-focused build means buying lots of s…
- Trading Cards, Point Shop Items and Bundle! - 18 December 2025
Hello everyone! Trading cards are here! In addition, there are also a whole bunch of Points Shop items, and there is a limited time bundle for the Steam Winter Sale.Trading CardsTrading cards are now available. Completing a set of them, allows you to craft badges. When crafting badges, you will also be able to get background and emoticons. Completing a set of foil cards, allows you to craft this stunning badge, in all it's radiant glory.John ApologueAnimated AvatarsThese are animated avatars you can buy in the points shop to use as your Steam profile picture. They are amazing, and I'm glad you agree.Animated Avatar FramesIf you just love your current profile picture, you can combine it with one of these frames. Also amazing, and one of them is from the Party Pad, from the upcoming Epilogue Expansion. Here's the link to the Points Shop for (the) Gnorp Apologue! A new bundle, with COOKIE…
- Hats, and Epilogue Status — (the) New Gnorp Times #23 - 12 December 2025
Hello! With no Half-Life 3 announcement, the world needs (the) New Gnorp Times more than ever. Today we'll talk about hats, and the current status of the Epilogue Expansion,I hope you are doing well, by the way!HatsAll the hat winners are now live in-game! Here are a few of them:The Mug Gnorp becomes a literal mug at the garden. Also featured are the Rock Gnorp, and the Unfortunate One. When enabled, the Hooded Gnorp appears in certain buildings. And there is also the Anglerfish Zygnorp. This hat, if enabled, appears during prestiges (and endings), and is a little raincloud. Some hats can be combined. This one is Stereoscopic + Bring Your Gnorp To Gnorp Day. These are all the implemented hats, made by you guys:Lei, by PumpkinburgerSnail, by JoyBandana, by Zymosan99Drill, by anonymousDented, by SleepyHead (with idea from Ultrakill Enjoyer)Frog, by KeroRobin Hood, by GoatBunny, by Pecan,…
- Party Pad — (the) New Gnorp Times #22 - 26 June 2025
It's time for another TNGT. I'm hard at work with the Epilogue Expansion and the end is finally in sight. Today I'm going to talk about buildings in Epilogue.The Epilogue is an upcoming free expansion to (the) Gnorp Apologue in the form a new mode, which will include new talents, buildings, mechanics and a different ending. Names??A feature that has been requested a few times, and that I myself wanted to see, was the ability to have gnorps with names. So I implemented that feature.The Naming Ceremony is held at a new building in Epilogue -- The Party Pad. At the Party Pad, you will be able to host three different parties for the gnorps, each granting a different benefit.One of the open questions with Epilogue was whether or not to remove the shrine. All other buildings are staying, but with the shrine I felt it would be interesting to find a replacement. In the base game, the purpose of…
- The Ring - (the) New Gnorp Times #21 - 9 May 2025
Welcome to another issue of (the) New Gnorp Times, voted superior to The New York Times in a recently conducted survey (Sample size: 1; Margin of error: ±0%). The topic of today is The Ring, a new mechanic designed for the Epilogue Expansion. The Epilogue is an upcoming free expansion to (the) Gnorp Apologue in the form a new mode, which will include new talents, mechanics and a different ending. The Ring If you look above while playing the Epilogue, you will find a number of particles that compose a ring around the planet of the gnorps. The ring is not precious. It is the worst. Not only does the ring reduce the amount of damage and collection the gnorps do through its oppressive presence—it is also hoarding talent points. Besides further beating up the rock, in Epilogue you also want to reduce the ring integrity in order to get those talent points, increase collection and damage, and…
- Gnomes and Gnorp Bundle - 4 April 2025
There's a new bundle in town and it is called Gnome Apologue because it consists of yours truly's game and Gnomes—a tower defense game where you endeavor to murder hundreds of goblins as, you guessed it, gnomes! I've been privileged enough to be part of the playtesting for the game, and I think it's a really interesting game with great music and great atmosphere. The developers, Tommy and Patrick, have done really great work, and if a turn-based tower defense game with well-designed mechanics sounds interesting to you, I hope you will check their game out. https://store.steampowered.com/bundle/51623/Gnome_Apologue/
- Epilogue Talents, More Hats, More Beta — (the) New Gnorp Times #20 - 6 March 2025
Another issue of the LLM-free, Gnorpitzer prize winning publication (the) New Gnorp Times has arrived. Today we'll talk about: — Another hat batch — A new beta version — Talents in the Epilogue Update Hat Batch #2 More hats have been implemented! You'll find them both in the live version and the beta version. A big thank you to the hat creators, and I hope they will be pleased to finally see them in-game! Zygnorps become united with machine — the drone gnorp. This was made by Matsan, and is acquired by the achievement "Y2K". I gave the Drone Gnorps some extra love with an animated booster effect as a replacement for the regular Zygnorps' little tadpole tail. Directors get some glasses. Nerds. This was made by Popgoes, and is acquired by the achievement "MY EYES". Wildly unsafe, but it's Bring Your Gnorp to Gnorp Day for the gunners. This was made by Caty, MetallicSaladFork, Pumpkinburge…
- Idler Fest, Hats and a Beta — (the) New Gnorp Times #19 - 3 February 2025
It's time for another edition of well-respected publication (the) New Gnorp Times. Today is the start of the Idler Fest on Steam, and I thought it cool to also provide a couple of new things to mark the event. Hats (and a bundle of balloons) The first batch of hats are now available! It's been a long time coming, but the first ones are finally here! There will be over 20 hats implemented into the game, but we're starting with six of them. These first six hats are amazing and they all look great in-game. They're unlocked by completing certain achievements — for example the SPEED achievement unlocks the snail-gnorp (snorp?), made by Joy. Fitting! Thank you to submitters Joy, Sleepyhead, Doshige, Zymosan99, and Popgoes! More hats coming soon. Beta update A new beta update has just been made available. You can access it by right-clicking the game in your Steam library -> Properties -> Betas…
- Happy Gnorpyear! — (the) New Gnorp Times #18 - 31 December 2024
Hello, friends. It's been a little over one year since the release of (the) Gnorp Apologue. 2024 I hope 2024 has been a good year for you — that you have made progress in life, whatever that might mean for you. For me, 2024 was a year of relative tumult and honestly personal failure: My primary goal at the end of last year, was to deliver lots more Gnorp. We're now at the end of this year, and the goal remains the same. The headlines of 2025: (the) New Gnorp Times (what you are currently reading) will be published at a regular cadence The Epilogue Update will be released A new game announcement and, ambitiously, release Idle Colony I would love to highlight a recently released game, a game which had (the) Gnorp Apologue as one of its primary inspirations. Idle Colony is, like (the) Gnorp Apologue an explosively visual incremental game. If the game looks interesting to you, I hope that y…
- (the) Gnorp Roadmap — (the) New Gnorp Times #17 - 27 September 2024
Hey guys. It's been, frankly, far too long. Developing (the) Gnorp Apologue continues to be a privilege, and today I'm going to share my current plans for the future. During the development of (the) Gnorp Apologue, game design solidified itself as my passion. I have too many ideas that I want to execute, but I want to get to as many as possible. My dream is to create gameplay-focused games with satisfying gameplay and a strong visual identity. Here's what I've been working on, divided into three parts: PART I: (the) Epilogue Update I've talked in previous news updates about the development of a hard mode, and this is the evolution of that hard mode. I realized that I would not be happy with myself if I didn't take the opportunity to add some form of new content to the game with the addition of a new mode, and thus a new path presented itself: (the) Epilogue — a more challenging, hopeful…
- Quick Fixes #2 - 26 June 2024
Yesterday I uploaded a patch that changed the order of shop items. I got some feedback that this should be an option, so now it is! "Reverse shop" is now an option than can be enabled. Enable this to get back to the previous order.
- Quick Fixes - 25 June 2024
Localization has been well received! Thank you! This patch seeks to remedy a couple of text issues from the localization patch that, ironically, exists in the English version of the game. I have also thrown in a couple of quality-of-life changes. User interface fixes Shop items are now listen in reverse order, thus preventing unintentional upgrade purchases UI now (mostly) disappears during prestige The logo should now be centered better during scene transitions Fixed some text issues Miscellaneous Fixed an issue that could cause a diagonal line to appear during prestige transitions
- Localization implementation! - Gnorp Gnews #16 - 21 June 2024
Hello everyone! I hope you are having a great summer (or winter). It's been a while coming: (the) Gnorp Apologue has finally been localized! I've been working with a company called IndieArk to bring this to life, and I'm very happy with to see the game translated. Besides English, the game is now available in the following languages: Simplified Chinese Japanese French German Brazilian Portuguese Spanish The game will attempt to detect your Steam UI language (or your system language if running without Steam), and if it matches one of the supported languages, it will switch to that language. You may also manually select one of the available languages. Fun-fact about the Simplified Chinese translation of the game: (the) Gnorp Apologue is translated to 糯米团子历代记, which roughly means "The Chronicles of Glutinous Rice Dumplings", or perhaps "The Mochi Chronicles". I think it's a great translati…
- 200k, Saves Update & Wiki - 1 April 2024
Welcome back to Gnorp News! Today we're going to talk about the Saving Update, and the Wiki. First off, the game has reached 200,000 copies sold! The success of the game was something I was wholly unprepared for, and it has taken time to adjust this new reality. My plans for the future have been upended (in a good way), and I am now working on three Gnorp-related projects: Gnorps in Space, a secret project, and most importantly: the base game. Today I released a new update to the game, which is a foundational update that includes improvements to saving and adds support for cloud saving. Here are the patch notes: Added cloud saving Gnorp saves are now saved in a new location! Your old saves will still be loaded, but new saves will be saved in the new location. This prevents a permissions-related issue, where saving could silently fail. Your settings are also saved in the new location. Gn…
- Gnorp and Chillquarium bundles up - 24 February 2024
Ben Reber of Chillquarium fame and I have teamed up for a little bundle called Gnorp & Chill. That means you can get Chillquarium for 15% off if you already own (the) Gnorp Apologue! Chillquarium is a wonderful little idle game, where you collect vast quantities of fish. It's a relaxing experience, and I am currently trying to get an aquarium full of golden fish, which I find very satisfying. I like to check in with my fish often, but you can also take it very chill and just enjoy watching your cute fishies. It's a game made with passion, and I think that's what indie games are all about, Ben and I are both solo devs, and I believe our games offer complementary flavors of incremental gameplay. So, if you enjoy Gnorp — check out Chillquarium. https://store.steampowered.com/bundle/39093/Gnorp__Chill/
- Gnorps In Space Preview — Gnorp News #14 - 19 February 2024
Today I want to share with you a very early look at the Gnorps in Space, and talk about some of my goals with the expansion. We're also going to be taking a look at more winners of the hat voting. You can read this here, or on the website. I recommend the website for some higher fidelity video viewing. Gnorps In Space Gnorps in Space, for those that don't know, will be a free expansion to the game. It will be a new experience within the game, where I aim to create something fresh and new through the leveraging of my knowledge and experience gained while designing the base game. It will still be an incremental game, and it will story wise be a continuation of where the base game left off — just set in space. In space, things will get as wild as they did in the base game — perhaps even wilder — for Gnorps In Space will be designed with physics in mind. The above video should serve to give…
- Hard Mode Talk & Hat Results — Gnorp News #13 - 20 January 2024
Hello everyone. It's Saturday, so that means it's time for Gnorp News. I'm still fatigued, and I think there is a valuable lesson to be learnt here: Don't crunch. But rest assured that I am really proud of my game, and that I am committed to being even prouder. You can read this Gnorp News here, or on the website. Hat Winners First off, we had some winners of the previous rounds of hat voting. They will be implemented into the game as cosmetics that you'll unlock based on achievements. There is also more voting to be done, so if you are interested in that, check out the Discord! Winners of Absurdist Gnorps Dented Gnorp, submitted by @SleepyHead, who was inspired by @Ruthenium Chip Resistor's initial dented gnorp idea Dorp, submitted by @MetallicSaladFork Gnorp On Top Of Gnorp Gnorp, submitted by @semtimmy Winners of Level-Up Gnorps Drill Gnorp, submitted by anonymous Robin Hood Gnorp, s…
- Hat Voting and Art Showcase — Gnorp News #12 - 13 January 2024
Welcome to the second Gnorp News of 2024! You can read this post here, or on the website. Hat Voting Commences In total, there have been over 200 hat submissions, and yesterday the voting started on the Discord. Winners will be determined and added to the game in a future update, forever immortalizing the creator of the hat in-game. The first batch to be voted on is the Absurdist Gnorps, with the next vote happening tomorrow, on Sunday. Here are the Absurdist Gnorp Hats: 1. Upside Gnorp 2. Gnocket. Gnorp Rocket. A gnorp that would press the button on the YX1-AB. 3. Dented Gnorp 4. Dorp 5. Handstand Gnorp. Do Gnorps have hands? 6. Gnorp On Top A Gnorp Gnorp 7. Sideways Gnorp These are all amazing in their own way. The current ranking is: 3. Dented Gnorp 4. Dorp 6. Gnorp On Top A Gnorp Gnorp. If you would like to participate in the voting, you can join the Discord. Here are just some of t…
- 100k players - 6 January 2024
Read this Gnorp News here, or on the website. 100k Yes, that is correct — (the) Gnorp Apologue has now sold over 100,000 copies on Steam. I never imagined that the game would reach this level of success. (the) Gnorp Apologue was to be a niche game, with weird gameplay, for a small audience. I am again absolutely astounded that so many of you enjoy the game. Thank you. I am also fatigued. The success has been amazing, but trying to stay on top of messages, feedback, comments, issues, has been overwhelming. Do not worry though, for the gnorping continues. I will steadily improve my workflow in this post-release world, and continue to deliver improvements and, eventually, the expansion for the game, Gnorps in Space. The Upcoming Hard Mode The initial goal with hard mode was to adjust some numbers and call it a day. However, I feel that would not make the mode adequately interesting. That's…
- Hotfix #12 - 3 January 2024
Coming in hot with fixes. In other news, I am currently working on hats, balance, and the hard mode. I will have more to share on this Saturday. Minor changes The festive hats are gone! See you next year! Both the gatlegnorp and riflegnorp reload sounds will now be disabled if you have gun sounds disabled Bugs Ice shattering is no longer audible everywhere Fixed an inconsistency with the sprites of the talent stone Text Fixed acid tooltip error regarding range Fixed some typos, and three instances where it would say "movementspeed" instead of "movement speed". In my defense, you are allowed to combine words in Norwegian.
